That Time My Kids Learned New Curse Words, Thanks to Unity

    Unity just kicked my ass. Professor Pacheco’s tutorial video had made it all look so easy. And for a moment here or there, it did seem pretty easy, and I was able to actually do some creating. But then the pinwheel would start spinning, the processor would churn and Unity would go BOOM.
    And the curse words would fly.
    The first installer downloaded just fine. But then when I tried to run the application after installation, Unity told me there was a newer version that I needed to download instead. Why didn’t Unity tell me that the first time? We’ll never know.
    In all, I had to download and install Unity no fewer than six times.
    Unfortunately I don’t have a lot to show for the roughly nine hours over two days that I spent trying to make something happen with Unity. Ultimately I was able to get to this point, but I couldn’t make my character move. All it could do was stand there and look at mossy hills.
Screen Shot 2018-07-31 at 7.02.14 PM.png
    I know, it’s not much. It’s not my best work, to be sure. But it’s all I got.
    You won’t believe me, but the earlier scenes — you know, the ones I lost? — were much more sophisticated. But each time, whenever I’d hit “Play” to navigate around my scene, Unity would tell me that I couldn’t use that mode until I fixed the “compiler errors,” whatever those were. Unity showed me a list of files containing the error, each with a gobbledygook name.
    How the hell do I fix those? Unity wasn’t telling.
    So I belted out more curses — introduced my kids to the really bad ones this time. I’m a terrible father.
    Then there was that whole Asset Store thing. Every time I downloaded the software, it would make a different set of assets available to me. The last download came with no assets at all. So what you see above came from the Asset Store, not from any preloaded assets.
    Overall, it was a terrifically humbling experience. I blame it mostly on my seven-year-old Mac, which is just fine for my purposes generally but just wasn’t up to this task. One day soon I hope to take another shot at Unity, with the right gear.

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